Financial Crisis Solution

1. Send Iraq a bill for liberating their country. About $1 trillion should be about right to cover our costs. We are a generous country so we won’t charge them for the loss of our soldiers lives or the work our country did in freeing them.

2. Send Mexico a bill for taking care of their illegal invaders. About $500 billion should be about right. As with Iraq, we can bill them at cost for all the free services we provided and won’t charge for the social losses we endured or ask for any profits.

Give Iraq and Mexico 30 days to pay. During this time we will work out the terms of payment since they don’t have the immediate cash. We will accept either free oil until the debt is paid, or arrange for their oil to be sold on the open market and the proceeds be paid to our treasury to reimburse taxpayers for the services provided.

Things have changed. We need to run the country like a business. Any businessman knows that in times of financial difficulty the first thing you do is tighten up on collecting money due to you. This will bring in at least $1.5 trillion that is long overdue. That would probably cover the current financial challenge and possible more.

If the ungrateful bastards in Iraq and Mexico don’t like it and refuse to pay, send in the Marines and seize the oil wells to pump it until we are paid back. (The nice thing is we already have the Marines in Iraq, so that’s a slam dunk.)

by DiamondRain, Matchdoctor


1 Comment

  1. I take your point about Iraq. If my memory serves me correctly, I understood that part of the grand plan for liberating Iraq was that the costs incurred by the liberators would be recovered through the proceeds of oil sales. Assuming that I have not got my facts wrong, what happened to that commitment?

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